SITUATION: You find yourself triggered by this one individual. No matter what he says or does, you can find fault in him.
We’ve all been there. In fact, right now I’m guessing you have someone very clearly in mind. Thinking about this individual, go ahead, I give you permission, name the three most judgmental beliefs you hold about that person. Now let’s apply some emotional intelligence to this situation.
Apply Emotional Intelligence
1
Turn Inward
How are these beliefs impacting your feelings and reactions to this person?
What thoughts play over in your mind when you are interacting with this person?
How might your emotions and reactions be different without these beliefs?
As you turn inward, you are giving yourself a closer look at what is actually happening.
2
Consider Your Options
Next, consider these questions.
Are your beliefs about this person 100% true?
Even if your beliefs are 90% true, what do you see in that other 10%?
How could you transform your thoughts about this person to be more productive?
How would these new thoughts change the way you feel?
3
Align Your Actions With What Matters Most
How can you seek to understand this individual? What else is going on that is impacting this person’s choices?
What is the value in finding peace in this relationship?
What is one step that you can take in that direction?
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